THEN

I had finally gotten it. I couldn’t imagine not being there. I was twenty minutes into my thirty minute cardio workout and a smile began to form. I had been doing this everyday for the last three months and twice a day for the last four weeks, but this was different. Something had changed. It was Sunday morning and there was snow on the ground. Church had been cancelled and there I was in the Gym. Sunday was my day off from exercise—my Sabbath—no work-outs. Yet I could not imagine not being at the gym this Sunday morning. I had broken through. No more excuses. No need for excuses. I wanted this. I felt it. This must be the “runners high” I had heard about. I had finally gotten it.

-- January 31, 2010 – 201 pounds

That was then. Perhaps it was the realization that I was approaching my fiftieth birthday, or that I was approaching 250 pounds. Whatever the reasons, they coalesced into what I thought had become a true desire to loose weight and get into shape. It wasn’t that I had not tried to lose weight before—I often jokingly tell people that I have lost over 1,000 pounds in my life, but that I have gained 1,240 pounds. It wasn’t as if I hadn’t hit age milestones before. I have obviously had eighteenth, thirtieth and fortieth birthdays. It was, however, that I was truly getting old and fat, and it is that realization that motivated me to get off my butt and get to work.